My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize