? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
How naked do you want me to be?
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
