Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
