just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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