i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
She told me I should be a condom model.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
