Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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