People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
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