it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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