so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Randomize
