I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
false alarm, still single
Randomize
