Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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