so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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