Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
