Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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