So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
