hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
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