Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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