it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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