is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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