Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
