She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
operation harelip BJ is a go
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
