best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
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