too bad you live with your parents still
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Randomize
