I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I made him laugh his dick is mine
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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