My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize