Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Randomize
