yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize
