"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
