I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
