remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
