No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
