that's an acceptable place to lick
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Randomize
