Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
