Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
You don't make any sense
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