I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
