Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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