i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
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