Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
