he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
