Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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