tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
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