It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
It's blow job season.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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