A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Randomize