I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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