hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
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