oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Randomize
