I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
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