Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
