sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I am available for nakedness
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