There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Randomize
