i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
