got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Randomize
