Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
if only i could text you this smell
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Randomize
