I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
The uberlube is also flammable
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
